Lilia the Librarian

 Lilia Constable

We met in Grade 9 Science class at a Catholic college prep school.
She wasn't the prettiest girl, being stocky, stolid, and lacking in physical grace. Some would call her features homely. However, she was kind and compassionate and had warmth and a sweet disposition. Her hair and eyes were shiny and chocolate brown with a hint of gold. Her skin was clear and glowing.

We were teamed to do a project together - to determine the contents of a thick black sludge in a jar provided by the teacher - a mean-spirited nun with elephantiasis of her lower limbs.

Since I was unable to commit to after-school projects, I told her to go ahead and work on it herself and take the credit for it and that I would explain my circumstances to the teacher.

 When I handed in my paper, I told Sister St. Margaret that, since I had to tend my siblings, I could not contribute to the project and that Lilia deserved full credit for the work. 

All I could say about the glop in the jar was that it was thick black sludge that reeked of sulphur. I was given a D.

 Lilia, of course, being a diligent worker, earned an A for correctly identifying the substance. She apologized to me. I have no idea why she did that as it wasn't her fault. 

To this day, I have no idea what that jar contained.

Years passed. Life went by. One day, fifty years later, Lilia came to my mind and I wondered how life had turned out for her.

I looked her up and discovered that she'd graduated university and became the Head Librarian at the school we had once attended.
She worked there until she retired. The school had honoured her with a retirement party. It was reported in the local newspaper. She was highly praised by all who knew her.

It seems she had married after high school and had several children, as well as earning her Bachelor of Arts degree.

She was still married to the same man all those years later and was a grandmother.

One husband,  one job, several children and grandkids, the respect and affection of her peers.
All in all, a good life for someone raised in a functional family who went on to create another of the same.

I can't imagine living as settled a life as that - I've never experienced it - it's like something from a novel. Do I envy her? Maybe just a bit... but, as I was told by a young girl at a dinner table - we get what we get and we don't complain.

©Ellen Pepper 2023

Miriam Gottlieb

 by Ellen Pepper

An elder woman sits at her desk in a retirement home, working at an online jigsaw puzzle and thinking about her life.

Comes a knock on the door, and a voice calling out, "Mother, it's me, Martha. I'm here to visit you."

"I have no children, dear, but come on in and we can chat."

The middle-aged woman enters, cooing condescendingly, "Of course you have children, I'm your daughter, don't you know me anymore?"

"You're in the wrong room. You've mistaken me for someone else. What is my name?"

Martha: "Don't you remember your name, Mother? Has it come to this?"

"Just tell me the name of your mother, and we can clear this up right away, dear."

Martha: "My mother's name is Miriam Gottlieb, as you should know."

"Well, there we go, then. Mrs Gottlieb's room is down the hall - Room 312. You should visit her - she hasn't had a visit from her children in over a year. Maybe five."

Martha heads toward the door, somewhat confused. As she opens it, the elder woman says, "I think she died this morning. That's ok, though, they don't remove the bodies until nightfall, so you can spend some time with her corpse."

Martha gasps and dashes down the hall.

Almost immediately, chaos erupts in the hallway - doors slam, voices are raised, and running footsteps are heard.

Nurse Hermingard  whips open the snickering elder woman's door, with Martha directly behind her and laughingly says, "Have you been pranking again, Mrs Gottlieb? You gave your daughter quite the fright. She thought you were dead. Now she thinks you've lost your mind."

"She's not my daughter. A loving child wouldn't stick their mother in a tiny room in a dismal place reeking of urine, dismay, despair, and death. A loving child would have taken a beloved mother into her own eight bedroom home and hired nursing staff - she can afford it. She's just here to see if I'm on my way to the final exit. She didn't even recognize me, Hermie. That's why it was easy to fool her. No, I'm done with her. And, if she's looking for inheritance, it's too late, I gave it all away to people who have shown me love, respect and compassion, unlike her."

Martha: "I would have recognized you more easily if you hadn't changed your hair. This is the best home in the city. It's very expensive to have you here. Herb and I had to jump through hoops to get you in."

"You're using my money to pay the fees, so the expense is a non-issue. This is not a home. It's God's Waiting Room. A home is with family. Loving family. I gave up teaching to give you a secure home. I stayed with your father so you'd have both parents in your home. None of that makes any difference to you, does it?"

Martha: "But what about my children -  your grandchildren? Will you leave them nothing? And I want your jewellery. You know how much I love it."

"I haven't seen my grandchildren in the five years I've been in this place. They have no interest in me. I no longer have interest in them. That's fair, isn't it? My jewellery has been given away. There's no reason for you to come back for it."

Martha: "But Mother..."

"I'm not your mother. You are not my child. Please leave and don't come back. Don't worry about my funeral arrangements - they've been taken care of. I'll be cremated and buried under a tree. No funeral circus. I'll vanish into dust. Don't worry, I won't haunt you because you mean as much to me as I do to you."

Martha: "I'll be in touch with my lawyer to get a POA - you aren't competent any longer.  

To Hermie: "I'm leaving. Can you get my parking voucher?"

Hermie: "I'm afraid not. Since you have no family in this facility, you aren't eligible for that."

Martha leaves.

"How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child".

Hermie: "Who said that originally, Ms G?"

"Pythagoras, I think."

Both laugh - Hermie knows that she's joking by the mischievous glint in her eyes.

Hermie:"I'll be back with your lunch in five. French onion soup and a chicken sandwich."

Miriam goes back to her jigsaw puzzle... and thinking about her life.

_________________________
© Ellen Pepper 2023

THE WANDERER

by Ellen Pepper

Hi Angela,

I hope all is well with you. I have some news from the farm. It's kind of funny. It would be funnier if I could tell you in person.

A couple of days ago, when I went up to the road to check the mail, I saw a tiny kitten wandering around the backyard all by itself while the other cats were waiting at the feeding area.

I greeted the little one and asked why she was so far away from her mum. Then I asked the assembled mums whose kitten it was. They all put on innocent faces and turned their backs. Except Blackie - she was watching intently to see what I'd do. Eventually, after she ate, Blackie took the kitten by the scruff of its neck and scooted off in the direction of Seb's house. He and his wife are the nearest neighbours.

Yesterday, I thought I saw it lying dead on the bike path near the road but when I went up to what I thought was its corpse, it turned out to be an empty and abandoned bird's nest.

This morning at around 8am, a text came from Seb, asking whether we'd lost a kitten. The poor mite was in Melissa's wheelbarrow and M was quite taken with it but they have already rescued several cats and thought that it should be with its mum. Melissa described it as looking like it's only a week old, but that I know for a fact that it's closer to being 2 months old - it's just small for its age.

Derek went over there and put the kitten in an Amazon box then took it back over to the  feeding area on our patio. Blackie was crying for it near the front door when she heard its meowing as it was taken into the house. She was frantic. She raced to the back and pulled it from the box, started licking it and gave it an exasperated lecture. Then Brown Mumma came by and they discussed the little globetrotter.

Blackie picked it up by its scruff and went off, back toward Seb's place.

About 10 minutes went by.

The next thing we saw was Melissa walking up to the feeding area with the kitten in her hands. It seems that Blackie had returned it to her yard. We all had a laugh about it - a good way to start the day. I think that Blackie wants her baby to live with Seb and Melissa.

Did I mention that this kitten is very cute and appealing as well as being an adventurer? It's obviously tugging at Melissa's heartstrings and I have the feeling that she's going to adopt it, sooner or later. I've never known such an intrepid wanderer amongst the annual crops of kittens.
I'll let you know how this turns out.

Take care, Sis
love, Emily

P.S. Tell your Amos that I'm proud that he graduated high school. They grow up so fast, don't they?
P.P.S. The farmer is tilling out back - he started up after all the fooforaw this morning.

©Ellen Pepper 2023

 

Spark of Life

 by Ellen Pepper

There's something magical about the human condition.
We are born. Most of us don't remember being born and yet, here we are.
We start breathing on our own but remain helpless for quite a while afterward.
We are not able to walk or talk or feed and clean ourselves. Somehow, we survive.

Time passes and many of us, in certain parts of the world, follow a set pattern in living: attend school, find employment, become involved in partnerships, and become parents. Not all of us follow that blueprint, though. Some are lucky enough to break away from societal norms to lead a somewhat more free life. This can be hazardous if one wants to live in comfort and ease. Walking away from the set program comes with the risk of being an outcast - not many can face that grim reality. Some, on the other hand, relish not being stuck in a prison of expectations.

Time passes, shit happens and we grow old. Then, inevitably, our bodies die and we're gone.

Children learn pretty early on that, not only do people and animals die, but they will cease to exist at some point. To a young mind, death is inconceivable until loved ones and pets vanish from their lives, never to return. Some question the reason for this. As time goes on, they ponder  the point of even participating in a life that will end - at which time they'll find themselves back in the non-place they were before they were born... that they can't even remember.

As far as we know, or are taught, our spark of life began when a sperm met an ovum and they hit it off, creating what would be us in less than a year. After that, the "adventure" begins.

Out of every 24 hours, we must stop what we're doing and become unconscious. If we fail to do this for too many days, we tend to become psychotic. Meanwhile, when we're "asleep" our minds create dreamscapes that may or may not be a product of our own mind but could be spiritual in origin...or just the effects of postprandial digestion.

During life, there are those who hold fast to a religion. Religions being created by power-hungry humans in order to control other, more gullible humans. Religions that cause people to exterminate others who don't share the same religious beliefs, all in the name of their "God", who, realistically - having created this vast Universe - has little time to give a toss about what people on this planet are doing in "His/Her/Its" name.

Death. Now that's always an unexpected kick in the ass. We claim to comprehend that our time here is finite, but, really, who ever believes that they will die? Sure, health enthusiasts do everything in their power to stay alive, or at least live longer - what with gulping down vitamins and following a healthy diet, but without taking into account the possibility of a Mack truck smashing into them, or myocardial infarction, or plague, or their Segway falling off a cliff - sending them into Eternity before their time.

Here we are, nurturing our own precious spark of life, even though it will be snuffed out, with our little lives passing unnoticed by those who come after us shielding their own spark of life against the harsh winds of actual living.

It seems to go on for so long, but, in reality - looking at the eons of time already passed - it lasts just as long as a spark from a matchstick.

Enjoy yourself and take shelter from the storm.

It’s later than you think.

©Ellen Pepper 2023

 

Artwork of the Eternity Symbol

by Mark Garlick

RIP, my dearest friends

 Someone is killing the feral barn cats with poison. Obviously, it's being done by clueless folk who have moved here to escape the city. What they don't realize is that the feral cats are essential to keep down the rat population.

Last year, a tiny, rambunctious kitten named Gollum came home from exploring and dropped dead near the feeding area.

Before he was taken away for burial, all of the other cats touched him with a paw, one at a time, to say goodbye. That fluffball of sweetness was loved by all, except his murderer.

Yesterday, a turkey vulture was seen feasting on one of our ferals who died in the bean field on his way home from wherever he was poisoned. After devouring his corpse, that vulture will likely die also.

Earlier this week, another cat was found dead in the same field. Feral cats don't have long lives, it's the nature of the beast - Nature does its thing. It doesn't help that they're also smashed into by transport trucks racing down the nearby 2 lane road. If they're able to, they try to cross through the ditch to get to the house for medical aid, but most don't make it that far. Their broken bodies are found on the front lawn. 

In the deep freeze of winter, the grey cat named Velvet was found frozen to death - she hadn't made it to shelter in time. She had needed treatment in the summer for a severe eye infection.

Last year, my beloved Harry went on walkabout and never returned.

Shortly after giving birth, Blackie brought one of her kittens to the door because it was ailing. It had a hole in its chest and didn't survive. She mourned him for weeks and neglected its sibling. Another cat mum took on the care and feeding of him. His name is Silky, because his fur feels like cashmere.

The cats in this yard don't kill birds. They're good hunters, but only when it comes to vermin.

They have warm shelters, food and fresh water every day. They are cared for and cherished.

The lost little ones will not be forgotten.

RIP, my friends.

 

__________________

©Ellen Pepper 2023

FRAUGHT

 FRAUGHT

She and He are sitting together on a long olive green sofa in their apartment.
It's late afternoon. August.

She: Do you love me?

He: Oh, here we go. Typical woman. Are you in the mood for a fight? Is it that time of the month?

(Silence)

He: Why do you ask?

She: Because I have no idea how you feel about me.
We've been together for a while but you've never said that you love me.

He: If I loved you, I'd say so. Since I haven't said so, maybe I don't love you.
Does it matter?

She turns her head to look at the sunlight shining on a window across the road.
He looks down at his phone.

She: Why are we living together if you don't love me?

(Silence)

He sighs: Must we discuss this now?

She: Please.

He: Look, we're just roommates. Roommates don't have to love each other, they just have to get along and clean up after themselves.

She: Do most roommates sleep together? Have sex with each other? Visit each others families at holidays?

He: This is not a good time to talk about this.

She: It's essential that we talk about it.

He: Why is that? Really? What do you hope to achieve by cross-examining me?

She turns her head to look at him.

(Silence)

He: Well?! What do you want from me? Have I ever promised you anything? Have I led you on?
I don't need you to love me. It's just not that important.

(Silence. She leans forward to pour herself some tea. The sun gleams on her hair.)

He: I really don't like your attitude. We were having a pleasant Sunday afternoon and you have made it fraught with emotion, as usual. I don't need this in my life.

She: No, you don't need me in your life.

He: That's true. My life is stressful enough without you having some kind of breakdown because of your feelings. I need some peace and quiet and it doesn't look like I'll find it with you.

(Silence)

She: You're right, of course. I hadn't realized that you think this way.
Since you clearly despise me, you should pack up and leave.

By the way, did you kill Elsie? You loathed that cat, and then she disappeared.

He: (getting up and crossing to the window) I have no idea what you're talking about. You must have let her out when you went to work.

She: I see.

(Silence)

He: I mean, if she had jumped out the window, she would have landed on her feet and run away. That's what cats do - they always land on their feet.
 

She: We're 10 floors above the ground.The ledge is too narrow for her to jump from.

He: That's because she was too fat. You fed her too much.

(Silence)

She: I'd appreciate it very much if you could leave; immediately, if possible. Arrange for someone else to pick up your things.

He: I'll leave when I'm good and ready. It make take me a few months to find a place that I like.

She: No, on the contrary, you will leave immediately. Go. Now.

He turns toward her with contempt etched on his face.

He: I will not be ordered around by the likes of you.

She picks up her phone and presses a button.

She: Dad? Can you and the boys come and convince this man to pack his things and leave here right now? All you need is a van because he doesn't have much furniture.
 An hour? Thank you. I'll wait at my door.

(Silence)

He: Please, baby, don't send me away. If I was the kind of man to say I love you, I'd say it, but I just can't.
Don't just toss me out into the street like this. I'll be good. I'll start doing chores and tidy up after myself. I guess that shit matters to you.

 I don't know what I'll do without you, babe. You know I can't live without a woman. If you dump me, I'll have to find another woman right away. You don't want that, do you?

Look, I'll let you go out with your girlfriends once a month. That's if you have any friends left. hahaha

She: You killed Elsie, didn't you?

He: Look, it was an accident, I opened the window and walked away to get coffee and she just jumped right out. It's not my fault.

She walks to the door, opens it, and tells him to grab his things and wait in the hallway for her father and brothers to arrive.

He collects his clothes in garbage bags, and grabs some furniture, and puts it all in the hallway, grumbling and pleading all the while.
________________________________

Dad and her brothers arrive and start loading the elevator.

Dad: Time to go, buddy.

He: Ha ha ha. Women eh? Always on the rag about something. She was never good enough for me anyway - I prefer classy women.

Dad: She's sensible - if she wants you gone, you must deserve to be gone.

She: He killed Elsie, Dad. He admitted it.

Dad: Well now, that's bad luck for you, my dude. People who kill cats eventually kill people. It's murder. Murder is a sin. The wages of sin is death. Says so in the Bible.

She starts to close her apartment door.

Dad: Honey, I'll call to tell you when we're done taking care of this business.

_______________________________________

Entering the elevator to leave...

He: So where are you guys taking me? I have no place to go.

Dad: Don't worry about it. We're going to take you somewhere quiet where you can rest in peace.

The elevator door closes.
___________________________

The van with his body and personal belongings won't be found until the lake dries up in 50 years or so.

________________________________________________________

© Ellen Pepper 2023

FOOL'S GOLD

by Ellen Pepper 

 

"I can give you 5 bucks for it.
It's not real gold."

"But it was my wedding ring.,"

"Are you still married?"

"No. Not since he ran away."

"Well, then...
that means that all you have here...
 is a lump of fool's gold."


Chorus
Fool's gold, fool's gold.
Annabella's wedding,
Her marriage,
Her life.
Fool's Gold.

Her momma told her that he wouldn't stay.
That she was a fool to take his gold.
Her poppa told her she was a fool to trust him.
But then Robbie betrothed to her...
 with a gold-plated ring.
Fool's Gold.

The wedding gown,
The wedding slippers,
The wedding ring...
all worth nothing
at the pawnshop.

Chorus
Fool's gold, fool's gold.
Annabella's wedding,
Her marriage,
Her life.
Fool's Gold.

 ©Ellen Pepper 2023

The Last Time I Saw Him

 The last time I saw him, I knew it would be the last time I saw him.
We hugged before I boarded the train. When I found my seat and looked out the window, he was just turning to walk back to his car. Usually, he'd stand beside the train until it pulled out of the station.
The last time I saw my father alive, he was walking into the sunset and the light was so bright as to cause him to vanish into it.

Less than a year later, I received a late night phone call from one of my brothers who told me that our father had been helping my aunt put up some kitchen cupboards over the course of the week. 

On the weekend, as he walked into her house, she excitedly told him that she'd put up a small unit all by herself.
When they entered the kitchen, he saw that the cupboard was up on the wall all right, but it was sitting at a cocky angle.
He laughed. She laughed.

They laughed and laughed and laughed.

Then he fell to the floor, still laughing.
He never got up. 

Auntie called an ambulance.
The paramedics tried to bring him back for 45 minutes.
He was gone.
He was 50 years old.

The final time that I saw his body, he was lying in the coffin, still smiling.
It wasn't til then that I cried.

 

UTTER NONSENSE

 Landing on the moon with friends, on a home made ship...

Three things happen at once:
• A klaxon briefly sounds – AHOOGA, AHOOGA, AHOOGA!
• The constant RAT-A-TAT-TAT RAT-A-TAT-TAT RAT-A-TAT-TAT ends suddenly.
• A suave male British voice announces, “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. Please return to your seats and fasten your seatbelts. We have reached our destination and are about to land. The local time is…well, I have no idea and the temperature is…so damn hot that it can’t be measured accurately. I hope that you’ve enjoyed your trip and travel AirPratsat Charter Services again. As there are no stewards, you’ll have to disembark on your own. Thank you for traveling AirPratsat! Have a nice day!”

“What’s happening, F*ck?” asks Lilith with some trepidation.
“What the Captain said…we’re about to land here on the Moon!” grins F*ck with insouciance, “I DID it! I got us to the Moon!”
“But….who is the Captain?” asks Lilith.
“Oh that’s just something I downloaded from the internets, my lady…and I adjusted it just for us!” preens the D*ck.
“Do you know how to land this thing?” Ankara queries.
“I don’t need to,“ sparkles F*ck, “we’ll use the parachutes to land!”
Lilith says with concern obvious in her voice, “But, F*ck….
THUNK
THUNK
THUNK…..
CRASH….
THUNK….
……………tinkle….tinkle….
BOOM!
                      “…..there’s no air on the Moon to use parachutes!”

Silence.
…………….PING!

“We’re here! I did it! I’m the first F*ck on the Moon!” F*ck jumps up and down with joy.
“I don’t know about that,” Morningstar muses, “Look over there.”
Everyone dashes eagerly to the window and looks out.
And stares agog.

The K’s start handing out fresh tinnies.
Everybody gulps them down.
“Oghod, oghod, oghod, “ says Lilith.
“Well, I never expected to see THAT, “ exclaims the Wraith.
“I need to pee,” whispers Ankara and makes a run for the loo.

Morningstar catches Lilith's eye and smiles with deep satisfaction.

Lilith covers her empty socket with one hand, while holding out the other hand to the Dark Lord,  "Could I have my eye back now, please...." 

Sterling Silver Starlight

 

Sterling silver starlight
dappled the limpid lake waters
as we sat on the sand beside it
chatting and laughing about innocuous things.

When we were young.

Then you mentioned Janice Westbury,
I'll never forget that moment.
You said that she was so fine and that you
would like her to be in your family.

Something shattered inside me,
I bowed my head and hugged my knees.
You saw my sadness and chuckled,
I thought I'd die.

Then you put your arm around my shoulders,
pulled me closer and said
that you wanted to set her up with your brother
because they'd be a perfect match.

We were young.

Five years later, we sat with our first-born child
on the same stretch of sand
the day after a storm and debris was all around.
We sang folk songs and lullabies.

Ten years later,
there were five of us on the beach.
It had eroded from a series of wild storms,
but we still had a fire and we sang.

We were not as young.

Another ten years passed and we sat alone
on our beach.
The children being older and away with friends.
We were glad to be together and at peace.

And then twenty years passed so quickly.
The lake was turgid with high waves,
We spoke of many things,
preparing ourselves,
should one leave before the other.

We were no longer young.

And then the day came that you were gone.
I sat alone on the beach
looking up at the sterling silver starlight,
knowing you were there.

©Ellen Pepper 2023

Maeve's Memories

 

"I miss Manhattan. The only time it's ever really quiet is in the early morning in Central Park near the reservoir after a heavy snowfall.

I miss the aromatic, omnipresent stench of urine smacking you in the nose as soon as you drive into the city." (smirks)

 "I remember the first time I ever went to a cafe and asked for a bagel and the woman behind the counter, Mrs Rubens, asked me if I wanted a schmear with that. I said," Maybe. What's a schmear? I'm from Canada."
Mrs R said, "It's a bit of cream cheese."
I said, "YES, please! Yum! I'd love a schmear!" I was so young then." (smiles)

"I miss the long walk from the West Side Y down Broadway to the acting school. The blocks in Manhattan are very short. You can cover them in 3 or 4 strides. Nobody on foot gives a damn about traffic lights.

I recall the day my friends and I exchanged nods and smiles with Andy Warhol as we passed each other in front of the Plaza Hotel, and we were giddy about it for hours - jumping up and down and behaving badly." (sighs)

"There was that day Yul Brynner and I spoke about acting in the Lincoln Center Library. He was listening to records with earphones while I was studying a script. When I was leaving, he called me over and we chatted about acting... like old friends, until I had to get to rehearsal. I wish I'd stayed longer. He died about a month later.
I was never really certain that it was Yul, after all he introduced himself with a different name - I think he said he was Jules.

I miss the camaraderie of New Yorkers when they knew you were one of them. God help you if you were a tourist, though." (eyeroll and smiles)

"I miss the spontaneity of the crowds and the magnificently bizarre interactions - like being surrounded by drug dealers while walking with some friends at Broadway and Central Park South and I scared them off by waving my arms, screeching like a maniac, and screaming out, "RUN!!! RUN!!! RUN!!!!" - which had the effect of scattering the dealers. We raced straight into Central Park chased by one brave guy who would not stop chasing until I turned around, raced up to him and asked what the hell he wanted. He said that he just wanted to sell some of his stuff. He was afraid of me. (laughs) Well, a guy has to make a living, right?"

"I remember the night of an ice storm when a bunch of us were on our way to watch a play and the most obnoxious dude was attention-seeking, as per usual - he was related to a famous Hollywood star don't ya know. He started belting out,"San Franciso, open your Golden Gate!" while flinging wide his arms... and slipping on the ice... and falling flat on his pompous ass. I laughed so hard. The others gave me side-eye.
 It's funny, but in all these years I've never heard of him making it in show business.

One man who did make it, had narcolepsy. He fell asleep more than once while we were on stage. How he ever managed to act for a living is a mystery. The man could not stay awake."

"Well, that's enough for now, my dear. You've been very gracious to listen to an old woman ramble on about things that... just don't matter anymore."
                                     ___________________

- An interview with Maeve Milton.
Recently recorded at The Shady Acres Home, Renfrew NY
_____________________________________________
©Ellen Pepper 2023

ABOUT BONNIE

 [Hank's story #3]

 

Hey Hank
It's me, Joe - Bonnie's brother. I don't go by Joey anymore.

Something bad happened to Bonnie. We buried her on Tuesday.

The reason I'm writing is to let you know that we found a box with your letters in it and a letter that Bonnie was going to send to you. I'll just tell you what she said in it because it's a bit messed up and hard to read from the bloodstains. You won't want to see it.

She didn't say much.

This is it -
Hank,
I can't ever come back.
The demons got my soul and won't let go.
B.

Anyway, maybe someday soon I'll come down your way and visit.
Sorry for the bad news.
Joe

_________________

 © Ellen Pepper 2023

THINGS HAVE CHANGED...

 [Hank's story #2]

 

Howdy Bonnie,

Since I wrote you a year ago, things have changed around these parts. I have some news for you, even though you haven't replied to my last.

Sandra's baby, Polly, is walking now and she's a handful - getting into everything and cheering us all up every day. She got a bit sickly for a while and we feared the plague had got her but it was just the usual baby stuff.
Haven't heard from Cousin Ned for a while. Heard he's spending a bit of time in the stockade for going AWOL. He just wanted to visit Polly.

Jack broke his shinbone and can't play baseball for a while. I have to deliver his papers while riding his bike because the carb on the pickup needs repair. Matt at the garage has ordered parts to fix it. I'll be doing him some favors to pay for it all.

Cissie met a decent guy and they're having a good time together. She's acting nicer now, which is a relief. hehe  Lucas is the strong silent type, just what she needs.

We lost the brown barn cat that you were fond of - hit by a truck and crawled through the ditch to the house looking for help, but didn't make it. She's buried behind the old horse barn.

I met a nice lady, a nurse. Lily. There was a benefit at the Baptist church for Fireman Ricky and she stopped in, even though she's an atheist. Well, so am I. She works at a hospital in the city but lives down here near the lake in a cabin that her husband built before he died. She loves the kids and they're easy with her.
It's nice because we never fight and we laugh a lot.
She has kindness in her eyes and a good heart.

Look, Bonnie, if you plan on coming home, you should tell me fast because me and Lily are starting to have feelings for each other.

Ok, truth be told - Ned isn't in the army and he's not in the stockade. He's in prison. Jacob and him robbed a store in the city. They waved guns around and got caught. There was only $27.35 in the cash register.  6 years for armed robbery.

Well, I guess I'd better close this now and send it off.
Let me know if you're coming back.

Hank

_____________________

 © Ellen Pepper 2023

Dear Bonnie

[Hank's Story #1]

Dear Bonnie,

I'm writing you now just to let you know how things are going.
The kids are ok.
Jack got himself a place in the Little League - shortstop.
The town chipped in to get him some gear, which was a good thing because God knows I can't afford it. hehe He's pretty good at baseball.

Sandra had a baby. Cousin Ned says he'll be a good daddy to it as soon as he gets out of the army. Sure, she's only 13, but she's always been the responsible one, hasn't she? Her and the baby will be staying by me until Ned comes home and marries her.

Cissie is going through growing pains and is a handful. Doing well in school but when she comes home...well, she's a firecracker, I gotta say. It ain't easy when she gets in a mood and starts smashing things. hehe

Lotta people dying around here. Some from the plague, some from the usual heart attacks and cancer. My friends Billy, Jason and Sam had the cancer - it took them quick. Too young to die.
So many funerals these days. I'm all funeraled out.

Some good news is that I got a job helping out at Grodin's apple farm. Doesn't pay much and it's seasonal, but it's easy work and pays the bills.
Jimmie at the feed store lets me pay on time so the animals are always fed.
Nellie foaled last Spring - didn't know she could still do that. She's old now.

I remember when we met in 5th grade - I thought you were homely and told you so. At first you were so mad. hehe You smacked me hard on the chest.
Then I saw your smile, so sweet that it calls home the angels.
On our wedding day, you tried so hard to be pretty that it made me tear up.
I thought we'd be together forever. I wanted to grow old with you.
You're a good woman, no matter what anyone says.
Sure, we don't see eye-to-eye on the ways of the world, that's normal I guess.

Anyway, my court date is coming up in a month. I won't go to jail this time because Buddy Williams said he's going to fix it with the judge - tell him about the kids needing me and stuff.

Sometimes I get tired, Bonnie. So tired.
Please come home.
Love you forever,
your Hank

 © Ellen Pepper 2022

'65 BUICK ELECTRA 225

by Ellen Pepper

Remember the day you tried to kill me?
  (In your precious '65 Buick Electra 225
with power: steering, windows, seats, locks.
And air conditioning; with automatic transmission.
Proudly rust-free!)

Yeah, it was a beauty. You treasured that car.
And you were going to drive it into the bridge,
with us in it,
just because I said that it was time for me to move on.
You knew that it was inevitable.
I'd told you so many times.

Anyway, I remember how you drove wildly through the streets.
Like a man possessed,
your white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel never faltered.
You shouted that you wouldn't live without me,
(even though you had been doing so for many months.)

I bet you wondered how I could remain so calm
 as we neared the end you had chosen for us.
How I didn't scream, or try to grab the wheel,
or even make an effort to talk you out of it.

All I did was say that you'd break the car.
Something inside your madness must have heard me,
because your foot slammed the brake pedal so suddenly,
that even you were surprised.

And then,
we talked of how it would be,
said our final farewells,
and you drove me home, safely.
We'd laugh about that day now,
if we still knew each other.

 

© Ellen Pepper 2022